Whod you bang
Uhhh...do I owe you any money? Or an apology? Or anything?
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
The greatest thing of my life happened today. I took a shit and it formed a smiley face. It's going to be a fucking fantastic day.
Hold on, I'm google imaging "vagina close ups" to see if mine match up
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
I went online and donated $30 to his walk-a-thon as a "sorry I puked in your bed last night"
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Randomize
