OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
Definitely saw about 20 people at my final that were never present before. It's like seeing who's gonna be serving me fries in 4 years.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
So i wrote 'don't sex me' on my stomach, so that if we got to a point where my shirt is off - he would know how i really feel, not just the alcohol talking
how did that work out?
Well, all the water washed it off, so we ended up fucking since i didn't have my reminder...
But i don't feel like talking to him right now. I woke up an hour ago to a picture of his penis and I AM NOT A MORNING PERSON.
do you think they make 'sorry for walking in on you drunkenly jacking of to a picture of me' cards?
Apparently he walked into the room and started yelling at some huge hairy dude to get out of my room. Except it wasn't my room... Because he was on the fourth floor.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
Remind me to NEVER AGAIN mix beer with tequila with beer with whiskey with vodka with rum with vodka.
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
Randomize
