Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
for breakfast I had vodka and flavor blasted goldfish. and I'm topless.
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
They shoved things up my nose I feel violated
he just cleaned his wound with pinnacle whipped
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
Came home to my roommate drinking a 40 in the shower. Chugging with his hair still fully shampoo'd.
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
Its like my group of friends and I are all dating and we're all just a bunch of Swingers, is that normal?
HE CALLED HIMSELF HOT BAR GUY.
If I remember correctly he wasn’t
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