I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I always have to poop after I paint my nails. It never fails.
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
i thought i'd fucked her to death. no lie. she just stopped moving.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
He took initiative. Dragged me into the kitchen and did me on the stove....while it was on! And then we made nachos.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
Randomize
