I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
Believe me. As soon as the boss man is out the door. I am on my way to wow your vagina with my horse-like attributes.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You know Sunday Funday was a success when 'puke and rally' came at lunchtime on Monday.
Shriek
We're playing drunken roulette. We're taking exlax followed by shots. First person to shit themselves loses!
Randomize
