dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
There's a woman here that looks like a cross between Michael Jackson and Flipper.
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
I microwaved pizza rolls, a hot dog, and bacon in the same plate with no paper towels. I drank the grease at the end. I'm going to vomit everywhere.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I'm just concerned it's gonna end up in my vagina again
i have this gut feeling friday is going to be interesting.\nAnd by interesting I mean I feel like im going to get punched in the face by his girlfriend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
We had sex then laid in his bed eating chocolate and drinking juice boxes. I think I'm going to keep him around.
If he’s halfway attractive, employed and cool with me having boytoys, I’ll marry him
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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