you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
Double fisting Gray Goose bottles. We've officially ruined her.
Awesome morning. I just met my boyfriend's wife, should I have shaken her hand or was the hug a tad over the top?
Come scavenge bits of tuna out of my chest hair
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
We should live in a duplex and just hook up with randoms for the rest of forever and be animal hoarders.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
Ok maybe now I get why I'm single I think I just broke a rib pooping
So it's official...my sex life has improved since Pokemon came out...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize
