I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
dude there's automatic no homos on brad Pitt and Leonardo dicaprio. Everyone knows that
Just waterfalled in the movie theatre... this is the beginning to a good night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
wow, you never really realize how many muscles you have in your crotch until you pull them all.
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
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