you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
Weekdays seemed more exciting when I had a drinking problem. Like I had something to look forward to at night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
My vagina and my morals are playing tug of war
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
My new dealer is 16. I have been getting high longer than he has been alive.
I don't see the problem
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My new roommate just announced that she got her period, popped a percoset, smoked a bowl, and started playing a video game. She says she's not moving till it's over. New hero?
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I wish I could accurately explain the embarrassment of standing in your bathroom with women's nair on your ass waiting to get in the shower.
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
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