Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
You don't even understand how penises react in the cold. I'm like a 8 year old boy right now.
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
I got kicked out of a mexican restaurant last night for being too drunk. This is getting dangerously close to rock bottom
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Oh and I found some acid for the drive back to school, productive day
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
So I don't know, I'm not a doctor, but I might be juggling dates with 3 different guys...
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
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