yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
They're watching TV in bed. The Golden Girls to be exact. Aaaand I just heard them singing along with the theme song. I love living with gays.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Worst decision of artistic career thus far: bringing a banana to eat on male model day.
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
I definitely think in addition to buying paint ball guns this summer we should invest in a breathalyzer. That way every drunk night turns into a competition, who can blow over the legal limit more. The loser gets shot while hungover. Shit goes hand in hand if you ask me.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
whoever decided snowing in 90 percent of campus on a night when the streets are flowing with tequila and skittles was clearly not an R.A.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
Randomize
