Im gonna name my vag after egypt, "the valley of kings"
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
Can the rest of this semester just go by as a montage?
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
it was like watching bambi learning to walk, if bambi was 22 and a high functioning alcoholic.
I found his retainer in my ass crack. It smells like shame.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
I have no idea, but there's a bus parked in front of my house and like 6 texts saying im gonna prove my love. this is either really really awesome or really really bad.
Just had a guy try to pull the maraca out of my shirt with his teeth... Wtf
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
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