I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Peeing off the roof of a motel lighting a cigar with matches and speaking fluent spanish with a chilen exchange student...how do iget into these situations?
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
why am i naked
you took off your clothes at the party and some guy took them home
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
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