You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
He came all over my face... then said "YOU HAVE BEEN ROBBED!"
What's this douchebags name?
Rob...
she said if she won the lottery she'd fuck me... isn't that like government funded prostitution?
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Wait, tell the rest at happy hour. I wanna be able to interrupt you with my loud cackles and stupid questions.
I got frustrated so I just stood up and said take me to bed or lose me forever and banged the first guy who responded show me the way home. Thank you Top Gun.
Just drink your champagne out of a trophy like a fuckin winner
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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