Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
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Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
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She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
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