How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
There is no way I am paying you $5 apiece for pot brownies you found behind a dumpster. $2, maybe.
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
We broke into the kitchen, stole cooking aprons, and wore them on the dance floor.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
A to Z: fucking your way through the alphabet
It'll be a kids book
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
I’ve seen not one, but three Facebook articles on my feed today about “how to eat ass”. Idk what the universe is trying to tell me but it’s needs to chill
My purse is full of condoms and money.
I like where this is going...
Randomize