How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
if i get killed by an online date, its your job to tell my parents that we met at church
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
using the left over highlighters from the blacklight party to study for finals. feeling the need to write insert penis here on my econ notes.
Fuck buddy has no power. Invited her over to use my shower. I love hurricaines.
So I just tried to wake him up with a blow job and he literally touched the top of my head and said snooze button
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
it would be so handy to have a fax machine attached to my body
I wish I could understand how you function in society
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
why is there a chinchilla in our apartment, and where did it come from?
question nothing. DON'T QUESTION A FREE CHINCHILLA.
Hopefully this dress says "let me rent your house" and not "let me suck your dick for money"
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
Randomize
