So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
Randomize