Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I don't get why Lindsay Lohan doesn't just blame her bad behavior on her twin sister from the Parent Trap. I mean nobodys seen her since.
becoming an adult blows. i don't think its possible for me to wake up for anything that doesn't involve kegs and eggs or half naked bums passed out in our yard.
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
you don't seem to understand just how much pasta i spilled on my bed last night.
you know u lost to a carboard cut out of sammy sosa in beer pong last night.
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
