its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
this is something i pride myself on being below average for
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
When I left you, you were walking into a room with a half naked girl. When I returned 2 minutes later, you were locked out of the room naked and she was screaming obscenities from inside. How do you manage to make every girl hat you?
ATTENTION ALL CONTESTANTS OF SLUTFEST 2012 ; not only will we be judging on how many penis you have sucked but also girth and length will be calculated. If you are found lying you will be disqualified. Remember your fellow participants will be rendering the same services to probably the same people. So choose wisely and let the games begin!
Is it bad that all my wine bottles have teeth marks in the cork?
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
don't let your emotions get tangled in that sexy beard of his.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Randomize
