He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
How the hell can the Olympic committee frown so much on weed and yet put on a show you would have to be high to actually enjoy?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
All I heard was "You have collect call from Lafayette Parish Jail for Dude it was awesome! I'll tell you about it later!"
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
They said an hour before I even see a doctor...and they noticed the shots tally on my arm.
I just realized that the thing that smelled like an electrical fire in my house was me.
Telling someone to make good decisions on a Thursday is like telling Santa to be Jewish.
I ran into my parents house and stole a bottle of vodka last night...Apparently left them a note that read "DRUNK. TOOK VODKA. BRING MORE."
If I ever see that bitch it is going down flavor of love style
he appreciated my fucking vagina for two hours he can appreciate my honesty
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Randomize
