He needs to realize that there's a big difference between "I love you" and "I love your dick"
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Vaginas creep me out. I'm disgusted by the look of them. I wonder if this is what having an ugly baby is like: you have to take care of it and love it but it just hurts you on the inside to look at it.
He was in Alberta for less than a week and is already banned from 6 bars. I fear for his general well-being over there.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I am on my usual post-jerkoff high of eternal happiness. Like I could punch a fucking tiger.
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm so glad you support me having casual sex with your uncle
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
Randomize
