I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
Wearing the BK Crown on the throne while dropping the kids off at the pool? Yes, one of my life's goals. Win
I take back everything I said about communal showers
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Either I just got hit on by a 10 year old.girl dressed like a boy or I just got hit on by a midget lesbian. Either way I feel uncomfortable
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Why is my car covered in what appears to be salsa verde?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
dude the last time we saw him was 2 nights ago when he was yelling that the trees were naked or some shit then he ran into the forest. I think its time for a search party
I’m home. Please don’t call me unless you have an arterial bleed or you’re on fire. Love you 😘
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