just checked my call log and realized that we talked for 3 mns. what did i say for that long?
pretty standard. you have fun last night?
apparently....what exactly does 'pretty standard' mean?
typical hot then cold, followed by a death threat.
Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
There was a lot of him and a little penis
how did he go about obtaining bull sperm?
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
My penis needs a shock collar
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
If you can't accept me drawing a Santa hat on your penis then we can't be friends
You know she's gonna fuck shit up when she shows up in a neon wind-suit
Like, I want sex but I also would be okay with Netflix
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
yeah it's a weird friendship. we pretend that we're automatic besties but i know we both know i slept with her boyfriend
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
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