How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
you are the best fuck buddy i could have, all the others get feelings and morals involved
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
