Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
so looking at the guys i've dated i feel my vag is a halfway house
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
Change your flight to Denver. That's where my penis is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
I'm one ex away from doing an entire victory lap of all of the guys I've hooked up with since second semester of freshman year. Single me is scary.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
she tied the funnel to the fucking ceiling...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ERIN AND I ARE GETTING MATCHING VIBRATORS. I'M PEER PRESSURING YOU INTO JOINING THE CLUB. Besides we're the three best friends that anyone could have, you better not ruin that by being a pussy and not treating your pussy to awesomeness. That is all.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
Is "I want you to destroy my insides" too forward?
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
i am rolling on molly so fucking hard i want to do 300 cartwheels
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