i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
If you don't answer the phone then I will be forced to leave you a wonderful voicemail of me throwing up
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Dude I walked 1.4 miles through the hotel wearing a cowboy hat, pink topped boots, gucci shades, and a scarf and met my parents in the hallway at 7 am how is this not a good start to Vegas?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
It's 4/20. I'm not too worried about "healthy"
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
My freshman suitemate just walked into the kitchen to find my fuck buddy making chicken enchiladas without me anywhere to be found. Awkward or awesome?
Randomize
