then for some reason i googled "how much to buy a cannon"
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
We tried to line dance with everyone but it turned into drunken stumbling and attempting to grind on random frat boys. I feel that this might turn into an every Thursday thing.
Everything is fine now . The coast guard said we just can't take the inflatable trampling out past the break way anymore
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
That would be a dream come true. Seriously, he's like my mount everest, my life's ambition is to climb him.
Kyle found me outside his apartment in the hallway. Said he didn't hear me knock bt smelled alcohol through the door. I'm sucha bitch to my liver
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
