You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I need ur penis! This is not drunk texting, either! This is I need ur penis texting. There IS a difference!
i cant remember past the part when we filled his tub with skittles.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You are the only person I know that goes to a bar enough to charge your iPhone there....
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
I think I may have accidentally stepped in fire
Ask me who hasn't showered since Sunday and just got cruised at the gas station on his way to work. I'm a terrible gay.
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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