New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
dude if i could bring that prime piece of meat home, id be the luckiest average-looking girl who ever lived
What kind of friend are you? You don't even blackout anymore.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
Ive given up on my natural charms. Im trying different accents till some girl wants to hook up with me.
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
I'm too drunk to be surrounded by this many indians
How do you manage to be drunk and a racial minority so often?
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
Drunk yet?
Well I just did the worm on an empty dance floor while the bridesmaids were serving cake. You tell me.
I may be asexual, but I owe you a solid from yesterday. I am a man of my word.
COCAINE AND SUSPENSFUL BBC SHOWS DO NOT WORK.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
