Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
I bet you think you're really funny for switching my line of coke with a line of protein powder.
He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
You lured him into the bathroom with a trail of jello shots, then proceeded to barricade the door with duct tape. You really should have thought that one through..
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
So I just did the math and everything in this room except the computer and my clothes has been in my vagina
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
I just found out who gave her jelly shots. You owe me a new mattress.
I'm on my third roll of toilet paper. Today can fuck right off.
You poured 151 in your eye, ran face first into a tree, fell down, then threw a lawn chair at the dog...all before passing out in the hallway and pissing yourself. There is no way to redeem yourself.
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I just described cereal to my mother as "acoustic breakfast soup".
who is this
I’m sorry I pressured you for dick pics.
Randomize
