you dont know how to answer ppls txts anymore?!?
im sorry, i don't get text messages.
ed mcmahon, farrah fawcett, and michael jackson all in one week. What next god, are you juts gonna take my penis too?
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
You kicked in the door when she was blowing him. You dont remember do you?
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wow, nothing is more special than changing the channel and seeing the guy who groped you on Saturday night...
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
When I said tequila slammers would be the death of me, I didn't intend it to be today. Oh god.
He's gonna be so upset when he get's a real job and can't do serious drugs.
Found a trail of Taco Bell hot sauce packets through the garage to our back door and cheese in my bra. I'll say it was a successful Sunday Funday.
My life. Always pantsless and occasionally topless.
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