I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
My facebook horoscope today said I will have a little "confusion". Obviously astrology understands a blackout.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
I've officially decided that whoever created hate sex should be on my christmas card list.
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
His roomates just started party boying me. He stood there with the look of horror on his face.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
It looks like I promised him my virginity, in spanish. What the hell did you give me?
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
My car insurance payment showed up today, so no inflatable hot tub for now. Sorry to disappoint.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
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