ive had 594 apples! thats 99 apples 6 times! math!
i cant believe jose lima did steroids
apparently the kind that make you shitty at baseball
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
I knew it was time to stop when you guys were playing a drinking game called "every three steps take a drink"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Holding a cold bottle of mikes hard lemonade against my pulverized taint....this is my Sunday night
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
Omg I just smoked and it was the end so I basically got resin and death, my throat feels like the twilight vampire description of their thirst for blood
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