halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I mean, he's 40, foreign, artsy but with substance abuse problems and estranged children. How is he not my type?
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
I mentioned the porn thing he mentioned a brother it all kinda just came together
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
My friend just got engaged and I'm setting vibrators on fire.
Your life rocks...
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
Randomize
