Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
He belongs with you like a mcdonalds playground belongs in Chernobyl
Just set all my clocks a minute apart. Now my 4:20 is longer by sixfold
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
drunk caitlyn doesn't know how to work gmail. so know an email has been sent to the entire campus with a picture of me naked eating a bagel attached.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
He was shirtless in my yard saying he was jesus
Cmon. I wasn't that bad.
You stumbled ass first into the litter box, and everytime we tried to get you to move you said " if I fits. I sits."
Randomize
