Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Espresso. Can't sleep. Love puppies
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I miss being able to drink at 11am just cause it was sunny outside.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
that's the best thing i've ever said to a penis
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Apparently "Do you want me to ruin your day now or later?" is not a good way to tell someone you're pregnant and it's theirs.
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
Randomize
