Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Just had to explain my "wine me. Dine me. Sixty-nine me" key chain to my grandma...she took it surprisingly well.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
We found you naked curled up in a ball in the closet, using a gorilla suit as a blanket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I was just doing the math on how much beer we need for the houseboat. in doing so, I came to the conclusion that we need to open a beer distributor business.
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
just got a call from a life insurance sellsperson and apparently our xany dealer referenced us. not cool thats breaking the 4th wall
HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT HOLY SHIT
So I just ran in to the Couger you saw me take home last month who i haven't talked to since then at Wawa and she was PISSED.. APPARENTLY i fucked her niece last week
Randomize