how hairy? two words: wookie tits
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I feel like college is just one giant drunken trip to Taco Bell
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I'M SO WET FOR FREEDOM
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
no dude he sent me cemetery flowers, i know it. they are half dried out roses in the shape of a cross, seriously. and he is not religious. so he robbed a freaking grave site for me. am i like an accessory to grave robbing now??
damnit this is what you get for dating guys with neck tattoos
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
