Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
We've shared an experience, my friend. I, too, have talked on the phone with a parent while giving a handjob
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
I might've decided it was a good idea to try to steal all of the pool balls at the pub... I apologize in advance that we now need to become regulars somewhere (anywhere) else.
Just because I tried to backhand you with a fist full of cash does not make me violent
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
You picked up her frozen vom puddle and threw it like a frisbee.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
NO I FORBID YOU. THERE ARE BETTER VIRGINITIES OUT THERE WORTH KIDNAPPING.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Whatever the emoticon is for "balls deep". That.
I'M IN A SPINNING VORTEX OF SELF-HATRED AND HORNINESS
Note to self: make sure the door is locked before the handcuffs go on.
Randomize
