i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
I just had to google "How do I get semen stains off of drywall." I'm relatively proud of this
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
do you know how hard it is to pee with a pumpkin in the toilet ?
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
Randomize
