Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Within 5 minutes of max walking in his pants were off and he was wearing my snow goggles as underwear.
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Side note, we are 25 fighting over our sophmore year RAs Drunk facebook attention
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I just found glitter from our Father's Day party on my balls this morning.
DAD WTF
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
