So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
I just wanted to yell " i am not a shake weight!!"
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In line at the grocery store. The girl ahead of me is in a wetsuit and just bought 3 cases of beer and a bottle of vodka. I want to go where she's going...
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
i mean, what better way to remind him of his failures in life than to fuck his roommate/fraternity brother?
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So my dealer asked me if I wanted to join his circle because we smoked so much this summer he thinks we're dealing
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I'm at the back whiskey bar with a 7 and 7 in a winnie the pooh costume. Come find me.
B. I found a note on my phone and all it says is 'Fuck yeah im a racecar'
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
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