I just am on my way home.. i had 3 and one startd crying and puking.. so they went home. one bitch fuckin ruined it for evryone.. u playin cards?
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Just to clarify, i'm coming over for tacos not a threesome
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
just found out that my aunt grows weed. today is a good day to be me.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
