i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I just found $40 in the jeans I wore last night. PS I also found the jeans I wore last night.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
Your drinking has interfered with your drinking. I bet you could get a scholarship to a rehab. Thats pro-level
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
Just did it in a room with glowing stars to Peter Gabriel's down to earth on shrooms. This is like god
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
Is it malicious or apart of the healing process if I wipe my ass with his toothbrush?
arnt you supposed to become a mature adult when you move out of your parents house?
Moving out doesnt mean I'm mature, it means I can make pancakes and bacon at 3 in the morning and no one can judge me.
Did I tell you I bit someone's arm for you last night
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
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