Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I AM SUCH A BETTER PERSON ON DRUGS
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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