I hate to tell you this, but your sister reeks of whore.
you thought your tounge was "malfunctioning" because every time u spoke it wouldnt sit still.
Not even the dog will look at me anymore.
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
Remember my theory about how the universe perfectly unfolds to fuck me? Well, it's at work right now
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Of course I have to cross through a walk for hunger
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
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