well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
Currently at a fetish club with a set of swings (don't ask). Having flashbacks to the park by my house
Moral of the story: I had sex to Back to the Future last night.
I was going to be upset with you on moral grounds but then i realized free chocolate was involved
That's pretty intense. There aren't many people I would pick over a burrito
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
You just missed an honest to god bukkake
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
It was like he was 23 all over again. Madness. I. was. so. scared.
Randomize
