There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
matt is drinking blue powerade and it looks like he has hypothermia. i can't take this kid anywhere.
No matter how fun it seemed the night before you will always regret taking those pictures, you will always regret eating as much as you did, but you will never regret the great lengths you had to got to get those bruises.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
Just promise me you wont die... or hook up with an old asian lady playing slots
Cant promise that last part. I won't die though
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
My fake id got more birthday sex than I've had in my life.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
I think if I send him enough nudes, he will buy my plane ticket.
After a crazy night, morning sex is just trying to find a position where you can thrust without getting seasick.
There's a possibility I may have hooked up with that British guy...
Possibility? You left the door open! Everyone saw!
Oh, and Harry Potter. We could be fuck-and-Harry-Potter buddies.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
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