I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
