Ur dog is a babe magnet. Reminds me of me
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the other day i was so high i found pages and pages of pictures of HD hamburgers and patriotic music. bong rips for merica.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Let's be honest, I'm cooking chicken nuggets in my Helm jersey and underwear who has their life more together than me?
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
I love you.
Bad choice
Don't come in. My door to my bathroom won't close because of the table and I'm pooping
Classy
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